02 February 2006

Today in the Science News: Part 4: Miscellanity

An opportunity missed:
I can't believe I never sent a telegram.

Now an entire generation will grow up not knowing those classic lines:
Western Union man
Bad news in his hand
Knocking at my door
Selling me the score

Western Union
dit-dit-dit-dit-dit dit-dit-dit-dit-dit
dit-dit-dit-dit-dit dit-dit-dit-dit-dit
Actually, now that I think about it, that might have already happened.

"Nine of the ten warmest years on record have occurred since 1995":
In the words of Mr. Bill, "OHH NOOOOO!"

I can't believe this can be true! What can possibly be happening to the Earth? What have we done?!?

...Wait, what's that you say? "On record" spans only 130 years?

Oh. Well, that's completely different. In the words of Emily Litella, "Never mind."

Singularity! Robotic deer catches poachers:
Actually, it just stands there and turns its head. But if you're dumb enough to shoot at it, then you're a poacher and get a fine.

I wish my audience read Sluggy Freelance so I could make a Deputy Deer joke here, but I have a feeling they don't. Alas, a brilliant joke must once again go unused.

On that topic, one of these days, I'll have to post the "Mrs. Peel's Jokes Go Unappreciated" series from my short-lived web comic. Some of y'all might actually get them without tedious explanation on my part.


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3:19 PM  

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