19 April 2006

World's Unsexiest Men

It's not often you see a list like this.

I'm amused by Randy Johnson as #2. Don't they realize he has a certain joie de vivre? And you know they can't call him the Big Unit for nothing.

Ebert comes in at #3, demonstrating that the Boston Phoenix does not appreciate his use of his sexuality as armor in daily life, and Alan Colmes is at #5. And #8? Osama bin Laden.

Ron Howard is #21, and Chris Kattan is #31, demonstrating that the writers have not fallen under the spell of Mango. Julian Tavarez clocks in at an unspectacular #33. I'd have to put him higher than that...can't think of many "men" grosser than he is. Same for Michael Moore at #39.

Barry Bonds is only #83. I would think his nasty attitude and the fact that he's clearly hopped up on steroids would put him a lot higher. Man, I can't stand Barry Bonds. I wouldn't care if we lost to the Giants 15-0 as long as Bonds didn't hit any home runs.

A few other names in politics, like O'Reilly, Ashcroft, and Lieberman, are on the list, and the bottom ten include Ralph Nader, Dennis Kucinich, and Brad Pitt. The glaring omission was Tom Cruise.

But y'all will notice that Chris Klein, the Brawny man, and Chuck Connors, all staples of the Skylark of Valeron Lifestyle, are not on the list.

(While trying to get the link for the story, I ran across an interesting blog called "mAss Backwards." He was going to respond with a list of world's unsexiest women, but...well, go see for yourself.)

3 Comments:

Anonymous kevlarchick said...

Was Dick Cheney on that list? I hope not. He's damn sexy.

6:55 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Peel said...

Nope, he was specifically excluded because "power is sexy." Feel free to speculate on other possible reasons.

8:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Uh, I hate that Randy Johnson guy.

And he's ugly too.

- the dead dove in Florida

4:39 PM  

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